This "Modesty" Thing.

Modesty. It's a word we all know. But there are so many different opinions about what it means and what exactly we have to do to be modest.

What do you think of when you hear the word modesty? The first thing that comes to my mind is wearing clothing that covers you appropriately. But that, in fact, is not the true meaning of the word.

By modern definition, modesty means:

mod·es·ty/ˈmädəstē/

Noun:

The quality or state of being unassuming or moderate in the estimation of one's abilities. The quality of being relatively moderate, limited, or small in amount, rate, or level.

Basically then, it means not being proud and conceited. Also, it means using moderation in what you do.

I also really love the Webster's 1828 definition:

MOD'ESTY, n. [L. modestia.] That lowly temper which accompanies a moderate estimate of one's own worth and importance. This temper when natural, springs in some measure from timidity, and in young and inexperienced persons, is allied to bashfulness and diffidence. In persons who have seen the world, and lost their natural timidity, modesty springs no less from principle than from feeling, and is manifested by retiring, unobtrusive manners, assuming less to itself than others are willing to yield, and conceding to others all due honor and respect, or even more than they expect or require.

2. Modesty, as an act or series of acts, consists in humble, unobtrusive deportment, as opposed to extreme boldness, forwardness, arrogance, presumption, audacity or impudence. Thus we say, the petitioner urged his claims with modesty; the speaker addressed the audience with modesty.

3. Moderation; decency.

4. In females, modesty has the like character as in males; but the word is used also as synonymous with chastity, or purity of manners. In this sense, modesty results from purity of mind, or from the fear of disgrace and ignominy fortified by education and principle. Unaffected modesty is the sweetest charm of female excellence, the richest gem in the diadem of their honor.

Wow, there's a lot there! From this definition we discover that modesty traditionally has meant (to sum up) humility and moderation. If that is the meaning, it applies to all of life - not just what we wear. We should be modest in our demeanor, and in the way we speak. Modesty is part of being a servant.

So how does this apply to our clothing? Well, if we have truly modest spirits, we will wear clothing that does not draw attention to us or our bodies. We will not wear a myriad of gaudy accessories, or flaunt of bodies with revealing clothing. We won't wear clothing that causes people to stop and stare. And, as the 1828 definition says, modesty also means chastity and purity of a woman. A modest woman won't wear - or do, or say, etc. - anything that is not chaste and pure, or that would compromise the purity of anyone else.

So now, what are some practical suggestions for how to do this? First of all, pray. Pray for God's help, pray that the Holy Spirit will teach you all things. (John 14:26) Only by Him is it possible to find out how we should live. (Eph. 5:9-10) Then, be willing to do what is best for others, not just what you (as a female who does not naturally know anything about the needs of men) think is right. If you have godly men in your family, ask them how you can dress in a way that would not cause men to stumble. Obey your parents. And if you don't have godly men to turn to, praise the Lord for the internet! =) We have some great online resources for finding out what is modest to men. Here is a link to a survey about modesty from over 1,600 Christian guys!

I hope this is helpful to you. Keep seeking God, and striving to serve Him and others in every way - including clothing!

Pink and white

 Next year I will be a senior. Some ladies in our church make lovely quilts for each of the seniors in the church every year, so I have been trying to think of what color combination I want mine to be. As I was pondering, I came up with a lot of different ideas, but wasn't sure which one to choose because I want one that I will like all of my life. I thought of pink and brown, but realized that it might go out of style. I considered choosing something neutral that I could use in my home someday, like blue, but I decided that I want to get one that I really like, not just whatever is most practical. I also contemplated choosing purple, since that has been the color of my bedroom for quite some time. But, I'm ready for a change. Finally, I got the perfect idea: pink and white!

 There is something so timeless and elegant about pink and white.

It doesn't go out of style, and you're never too old for it.

It's graceful and lovely,

 It's cute and sweet looking,

 

It's captivating and breathtaking,

 It's gentle and feminine,

 It's relaxing and refreshing.

All in all, I think it will be the perfect choice for my quilt. Since Cody moved away, I am going to move into his bedroom because it has some advantages over mine. For my birthday this year Mom and I are going to work redecorating it this summer with garage sale finds, renovated old decorations, and lovely sale items. I will really enjoy having a new bedroom and being able to spend time working on it with mom. :) Hope you all enjoyed these lovely pictures as much as I did!

Restored dreams

Lately I have been thinking thoughts that I haven't thought in a while. Somehow, as a teenager in our modern culture, I've lost the vision I used to have for my life. When I was a little girl, all I wanted out of life was to be a godly wife and mother, and to have a simple, loving home. But, of course, ideas like that are "out-of-date" and repugnant to us these days. After all, isn't it absolutely vital for women to go to college and have a thriving career? She could get married later on if she really wanted to, and maybe have a baby... but only as a supplement to a successful career. Being a homemaker is demeaning to women. Equality of the sexes! Women's rights! Our culture flaunt feminism, instead of femininity.

The Bible, however, has a different approach. Titus 2:4-5 says, "...admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed." Also, 1 Timothy 5:14, which encourages, "Therefore I desire that the younger women marry, bear children, manage the house, give no opportunity to the adversary to speak reproachfully,"

This is what we were created for. This is the pattern of scripture. From the very beginning mankind was told, "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh," and, "Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it; and have dominion over... the earth." (Genesis 2:24 and 1:28) And, this is a beautiful thing!

Often it's easy to be repulsed by the idea of submission, or "gentleness and quietness of spirit" because it's easy to misunderstand these concepts. Submission does not mean being beneath or lower in value. Jesus Christ is in submission to God the Father! It's a joyful position that has blessing and value equal to the position of leadership. Gentleness and quietness does not mean somber, oppressed silence. To be gentle is to not be harsh, to be considerate and kind. Even men are commanded to be gentle. (1 Timothy 6:11) In order to have a quiet spirit, we must quell the clamor in our hearts. Vanquishing all fear, anxiety, hurry, stress, and worry will cause our spirit to finally be quiet enough for us to hear God's still, small voice. I don't know about you, but I think that sounds wonderful, not oppressive!

The Bible doesn't encourage wimpy, whiny, helpless women(even though many people think it does). On the contrary, radiant and courageous femininity is commanded! Reading proverbs 31, you will find that the godly woman is diligent and strong, yet wonderfully selfless. She works hard and is strong for purpose of serving others, not for pursuing her own plans.

Before I end this post, I want to say that the Bible is not opposed to women having a job outside of the home. Deborah, for example, was a judge. (Judges 4) What I would like to do is dispel the false ideas that we as women often have towards scriptural instruction to us, and to point out that marriage is the norm in scripture, not career.

God has a specific, unique plan chosen for each of his daughters. He has restored my dreams of courageous femininity, and I hope He will give you that vision, as well.